There's a lot of talk about racism at the moment isn't there?
With the terrible scenes at Woolwich Barracks, I suppose it was a bit of a forgone conclusion. It really doesn't take long for the bug-eyed mentalists on both sides of the argument to start rattling sabres and throwing tomatoes at each other. But once either side achieves critical mass, you'd better just stand back and let them get on with it, because it becomes a self sustaining reaction.
Let's get my position fortified first before I start receiving the hate-mail. I don't believe for a second that what happened to Drummer Lee Rigby was an organised terrorist attack, sponsored by al Qaida, al-Muhajiroun or any other 'real' terrorist/extremist organisation.
It's my personal opinion that the two chaps involved are just f*cking mental - One slightly more than the other. And were one day sat in their lounge, throwing chips into the air and catching them in their mouths, when one gets the great idea that they could get famous by killing a squaddie.
'But why would we do that?' Asks Less Mental.
'To be famous!' Replies More Mental.
'We'll never get away with it.' Opines Less Mental.
'We'll pretend we're terrorists, the police are really hands-off with terrorists.' Says More Mental.
'But don't you have to be an Islamic type person?' Quips Less Mental, threatening to blow the whole operation.
'Your point?' Asks More Mental.
'Well, We're from Romford. And we went to your Mum's for Christmas dinner last year. So I kind of assumed that we were Christian.' Explains Less Mental.
'Ah, got that covered, you're right, I was Christian, but I converted to Islam about ten years ago - After I bought that Cat Stevens album off of Amazon. In fact, from now on, I want you to call me Mujaahid.'
'Mujahadeen? Isn't that those Afghan blokes, out in the desert, with the flat caps?'
'Look, stop d*cking about, let's get on with it.'
'We'll never get away with it... We'll get shot or something.'
'Nah, it'll be fine, once we say that we're Islamist terrorists, they'll all be so busy lynching Asian people that they'll forget all about two geezers from Romford, whose parents are from Nigeria. Remember though, we'll have to completely incapacitate the soldier so that there's no chance of it being a fair fight.'
'You're really counting on a knee-jerk reaction by the whole of the British public to mask our escape? I didn't realise you were THAT mental, they're not THAT stupid... Are they?'
S'funny though, I've not seen much backlash against Nigerians (Although I guess they were both born in the UK - Maybe we should all march on Romford with torches and pitchforks) but plenty against Muslims in general. weird that innit?
It's like they're our go-to bad-guy...
It's snowing on the Bank-Holiday? - Blame Islam
The corner shop's run out of Old Holborne - Blame Islam
Two airliners fly into American skyscrapers - Blame the FBI/CIA
Now the serious bit... For those of you who say that I'm making fun of the situation. I'm not, really - The people that I'm taking the p*ss out of are the mentalist, swivel eyed. 'If you hate Britain so much then go home.' brigade. Thing is, for most of these people, this is their home - They've never been to Nigeria or wherever their parents or even their parents' parents were from.
I'm really very sorry for the loss of Drummer Rigby, my thoughts are with his family and friends. It's a tragic thing that never should have happened.
But don't blame Islam
Don't blame the Police
Don't blame the Government
Blame two mental guys from Romford - They're who did it, no-one else.
They're the people who killed the soldier - Whose only crime was to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.
They're the people who widowed a woman and orphaned a child.
They're the people who raped an otherwise peaceful religious text to publicise themselves and increase their infamy.
Not this time...