Trigger Warning

OK, It seems that I officially have a 'Trigger'

I think that's the right word - I've been seeing the phrase 'Trigger Warning' used to label blogs and suchlike that have things like traumatic scenes or violence towards animals, children, women, the dispossessed, the poor, the huddled masses, immigrants - Any sort of 'group' really being portrayed as a victim for one reason or another that can cause feelings of anger or trauma in the reader. Maybe it's because of something you yourself went through, or someone close to you, or someone you've read about... Even if it's someone that doesn't exist and you've made them up in your head just so you can hang your righteous indignation on them like the last coathook at choir practice, doesn't matter, they're all valid: trigger.

Seems simple enough - You read something that gets your goat - you don't like it - you sound off about it and feel much better. It doesn't matter who you upset, you feel better and that's all that matters.

Except, no, it's actually not. It's not OK to spazz out and direct some stream of vilifying bollocks at someone who was simply voicing their opinion just because they used a word that you didn't like (Yes I'm oversimplifying it intentionally, I do that, do try and keep up) They didn't know... And to a point, it's not their problem. Maybe they've had a really crappy day, maybe something's happened to them recently and everything fell into place and it became obvious to them that it was [insert thing that happens to be your trigger]'s fault.

Who's fault is it?

Well, no-one's actually - maybe at the outside it could be argued that it's yours for being 'triggerable' I don't know, that seems unkind when you think about it - But life's often like that isn't it? We all like to think that we're special little snowflakes, all touched by the hand of the maker, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like a god. But we're really not - We're each about 2lbs (1Kg) of pinky-grey snot in a bone-box being carried around in a meat-suit controlled by a frankly unbelievable set of low-voltage electrical impulses that has no reason or right to work at all.

And yet we're still upset by The Daily Mail?

Before this veers off into the long, dry grass of existentialism, let's steer it back on the road towards something much more interesting and valid:

Me...

Because it was me that we were talking about - And this is still my Blog. What is my trigger you ask? Well, you probably don't ask, you've probably wandered off to catch a Pokemon and walked into a tree by now, but let's imagine someone is still listening.. reading... whatever... My trigger is 'Men'

Not 'men', the male of the species, owners of 'outie' reproductive organs, hunters, gatherers, wearers of polished shoes and tight, white, briefs and beard growers. But 'Men' with the horns and the pitchforks and the having everything that they do given to them on a platter, the ones who are threateningly tall, or scarily muscled or malevolently tattooed or in positions of power that have been provided solely so that they can look down upon everyone that isn't them and laugh and laugh and laugh, the obvious pedophiles, the members of 'clubs' that have ties.

You know, the ones that are usually stuck at the end of a sentence like, 'But that wouldn't have happened if I was a man. You get me?'

Men are the root of a lot of the world's evils, I'm not denying that in the slightest, significantly more rapists and murderers and despots and pedophiles and terrorists are men than are women in this day and age - I'm totally fine with that... Wait, no, I'm not totally fine with that in the slightest, it's a terrible thing to have to say about your own gender - But I'm fine with people saying it - because, ostensibly, it's true. If you dig deep enough into 99% of the worlds problems, you'll find an overweight middle-aged bloke pointing and saying 'I did that, comrade.'

I'll pause here to mention that's it's dead easy to say 'But what about Angela Merkel?' or 'I think you're forgetting Magdalena Solis!' but try and bear in mind that I said 'More', and not 'All'... 

And that brings me back around to my actual trigger - It's where the word 'Men' is taken to convey 'All men', whether it's meant that way or not. You can infer from what is said that the speaker, or the writer or whatever means that Men are murderers, Men are pedophiles, Men surf through their lives on a magical silver serving dish being permanently fellated by innumerable slaves whilst ignoring the more widespread female burden.

And I'm sure that some are, and I'm sure that some do...

But not all.

It's never all.

The Philpott Fire

Originally posted on Facebook 31/5/12

OK Derby, I get it... We've had a pretty crappy time of it recently as far as kids being hurt and killed and feelings are running high... But some of the hate that's been pouring out of normally quite lucid people has made me wonder. I'm probably going to get pilloried for this but it's bringing to mind the old Frankenstein films with the torches and the pitchforks, and that's not a good look for anyone I know...

First of all, let's imagine that you're all right - A couple makes the concious decision to kill six of their children, by fire. If that's what happened then I hope they both burn forever in whatever portion of Hell that Satan reserves for people who commit any kind of crime against defenseless children.

Can you imagine doing that? Can you imagine looking into your own children's eyes (remember, that Jayden, the youngest, was only five years old) as you tucked them into bed, kissed them goodnight, all the time knowing that within hours you would start a fire with the sole intention of burning them alive? No, of course you can't, because you're a human being... You can maybe almost forgive the single mother who shakes her baby to death out of frustration and lack of support - But this is something so far off the scale of normal human behaviour... Unforgivable, completely - And if this is the case then I side firmly with the 'Death's too good for 'em' brigade.

But then, instead, imagine for a second that you're stuck, you're at your wits end. Maybe the bills are piling up, maybe you owe money to people at 2,476% APR, or even worse, to people who'd rather take the use of your legs away with a bat if you don't pay up. You're desperate, and you turn to crime... Not mugging old ladies, not doing over Post Offices, just a nice, quiet bit of insurance fraud. It'd be easy, take what real valuables you had to your mates house, the irreplaceable stuff.. Old photos, your Mum's jewellery, stuff like that, then just start a small fire...

Once you've tucked the kids up in bed, pour a bit of petrol by the front door, make it look like someone lit it through the letterbox. Why would the kids still be there? To make it look more believable of course - I mean, what psycho would set fire to his own house with the kids still inside? You let it burn for a while, after all there has to be some real damage. Then the fire takes hold... You never realised how fast cheap polyester carpet burns, or how difficult it is to put out, the flames spread to the stairs (all one piece of carpet, remember) and the wallpaper catches, the curtains smoulder and the poisonous smoke is filling the house. You shout for help, you yell the kids to wake them up... Maybe the smoke's already done it's work, it happens quicker than you think. You start to panic.

You try to make it up the stairs but the flames beat you back, you realise there's nothing you can do, then you hear the sirens and think everything will be OK...

But it's not, and it never will be again... How would you feel knowing it was all your fault? That through your own stupidity you'd accidentally murdered six of your own children?

Then again... What if they're telling the truth? someone HAD tried to burn down their house with them in it? And we're all so desperate for blood and spectacle that shouting 'Murderers!' is easier than thinking 'If it can happen to them, maybe it can happen to me'?

I don't have any association with the Philpotts and I know precisely as much about the case as 99.99% of other people - i.e. virtually nothing - But the above scenarios are as likely as any other one that's been made up using the freely available facts.

Rest in Peace, and I pray to God that justice is done.

By the way, when was the last time you checked the batteries in your smoke alarm?