Monday, 13 July 2015

Men stare at boobs – FACT!

Yes, of course the title of today’s blog is Clickbait – I used the word ‘boobs’ which is a trigger word for both sexually-active males and ladies with relaxed gender roles.

However, it also ‘kinda-sorta’ fits with what I wanted to talk about because it’s about an experience I had, in the company of my adoring and supportive wife, which made me think about the plight of ladies. Specifically those ladies with breasts, and even more specifically, ladies whose breasts are on display save for a t-shirt or low-cut blouse for instance.

[Dons tin helmet to avoid damage from brick-throwing people yelling ‘Misogynist!’]

Let me just say that I feel breasts (I was toying with finishing the sentence there, but I quickly thought better of it) are completely the property of the people that they’re attached to.  You can do with them as you will… Cover them up, get them out, paint them to look like comedy animals… Whatevs! – They’re yours – Gods, you can probably even feed babies with them if you want (as long as you cover yourself over with a blanket whilst you’re doing so and try not to offend anyone that is - wouldn’t want anyone using them for their designed purpose when there’s erotic flaunting to be done.)

Anyway, back to the point in hand (f’narr f’narr) – I bought myself some T-Shirts last week, they had slogans on them, as many T-Shirts do.  I wore one of them during an impromptu trip to my local shopping centre on Sunday – This is the T-Shirt.

As some of you will know, this is a quote from the BBC UK Television series ‘Sherlock’ starring Martin Freeman and Stickleback Bumberclart.

For the record, many-many people stared at my chest… And being the dirty-whoer that I am, I quite enjoyed the attention.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure I’d get tired of it after a while… And this is why I find myself suddenly sympathising with ladies whose upper chestal area is worthy of notice. 

(This is a blatant lie – As with most men, we are all a shot of Tequila away from being a male peacock – I would say that 90% of the people staring at my chest were women and the law of averages says that 50% of them would be attractive – to me, by my shallow personal standards – And yes, I still have my helmet on so you’re wasting your time throwing those things – All men are pigs, we pretend to agree with feminist issues so that you will eventually sleep with us – That’s another fact. We’d much rather that you made us a sandwich, and be naked whilst you do it, if possible)

But if we push boobs to one side for a moment (This stuff just writes itself, sorry) – What actually is the difference between a psychopath and a sociopath? – Even a High-functioning one?

Well, they do say that both conditions are what is known as an ‘Antisocial Personality Disorder’ – So they’re not hugely dissimilar when it comes down to it.   The first real difference is that Psychopaths tend to be ‘Born’ possibly with some kind of brain lesion, and Sociopaths are ‘Made’ by their environment – A real case of Nature Vs Nurture here.  Psychopaths can form massively complex social relationships based entirely on fiction, purely to benefit themselves – Sociopaths won’t bother, you’re below them… Really quite a way below them.

Even their attitudes to criminality are totally different – Your garden variety Psychopath will plan and plan in the finest detail and there’s a very good chance that you will never discover that a crime has been committed (Unless you’re the one who’s dead, buried in an oil-drum, with your thumbs removed and sewn up your bum).  A Sociopath won’t plan at all - If they feel like committing a crime, they’ll do it there and then.  They firmly believe that the laws don’t exist for them – that laws are just for the common people

As a rule, Psychopaths feel no fear and have no sense of right or wrong, whereas Sociopaths do – But they’ll have their own ideas of what they class as ‘moral’ behaviour which might not go along with those of the general populace.  On the whole, Sociopaths are less dangerous… One might kill you if you were to make them angry enough.

But a Psychopath will kill you to death with a rusty spoon because you look like their Mum’s old milkman.

So, which one are you do you think?

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